1-Year-Old Baby Refuses Diaper Change: 8 Tips on What to Do!

Some babies and toddlers absolutely hate diaper changes! They are too busy and too impatient to lie down to have their diapers changed, and the whole situation can easily turn into an exhausting power struggle. What to do? As always with young little humans (and most adults, too, by the way), it is much better to choose fun over fight!

Here are some of the ideas I used when I was a new mom faced with a little toddler boy who hated diapers and diaper changes.

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Question:

What if a baby refuses diaper change..? Our granddaughter is almost 1 year old and hates diaper change! When we lay her down to try and change her diaper she screams like someone is killing her and she can’t catch her breath. She also tries to get away.

We get her every month for a week and this is the first time she has done this. Help, she’s our angel and we need to know what to do.

Thanks

8 Helpful Tips When Baby Fights Diaper Change

Natural development to assert her independence

What a lucky girl to have her grandparents for a week!

There is nothing wrong with your granddaughter – I think she’s being a typical 12-month-old asserting her independence, which is a good thing, but exhausting…

Children that are very determined and want to be exploring and doing their own thing don’t want to lie down and have their diaper’s changed. How boring! And they are also in a position of disempowerment.

This is something we all go through – one minute we have this angelic, smiling little bundle who seems happy to go with the flow, the next we have this opinionated, stubborn and vocal little person who makes her feelings known when she/he doesn’t like something.

There’s not a great deal you can do about this, and you shouldn’t either because it is a natural, healthy development. But there are ways to deal with this specific situation!

Hands-on tips when baby or toddler hates diaper change

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It is really hard trying to change a messy diaper with the baby trying to get away! The best thing at this age is distraction. Tell her beforehand you are going to change her diaper so she is not taken by surprise, but also offer a distracting choice.

1. Prepare her by talking about it

If you first say what you are going to do and why and talk and explain to her, she will start to understand reasoning. Plus, if you offer a distraction that she has a choice about, she has some power.

She will also have the time to mentally prepare for having her diaper changed.

I know she is still young, but in addition to words, you can show her the diaper and point to the bathroom so she understands what is going to happen

Many parents get into a power struggle with their babies, and it becomes really unpleasant with Baby getting a smack to keep them still.

2. Consider your timing

Unless the baby or toddler is very prone to diaper rash, waiting five or ten minutes to let your granddaughter finish her playing or for you to connect first by playing together is not going to do any harm at all.

Why not first “change diapers” together on her teddy bear and then move on to her… (If she appreciates that game.)

3. Offer a fun distraction

Far better than a power struggle is to give her something interesting to do or play games like Where’s your nose? Where’s your chin? That way, changing time is interesting and fun, not a battle for domination.

4. Make yourself a fun interaction

Be creative! Is there a song she loves that you can sing for her? Does she like it when you make funny faces? Maybe you can make funny faces together

5. Special toys for the occasion

Could you buy a couple of “diapering toys” that she would appreciate and that she only gets to play with during diapering?

6. Offer a choice

Another possible distraction is to bring two books or toys and offer her the choice – “Do you want to read this book or this book while I change your diaper?” (and have the other one on hand too!)

7. Change the diapering position

In addition to pleasant distraction and interaction, another possible solution to consider is to let your granddaughter stand up while changing the diaper. This, of course, can’t be done until she is able to stand up without falling, but if she is, then you can consider trying to change her diaper while she is standing on e.g. the toilet (of course, supported by you).

I started changing diapers while my toddlers were standing up quite early with all our kids exactly for the reason you describe—they started refusing to lie down. Just a thought. It might be a bit too early for that, but keep it in mind in the coming months.

8. Early potty training

Another long-term solution – if she continues to hate diaper change and if she behaves the same way with her parents, is to consider introducing the potty and see how it goes.

My youngest son was just like your granddaughter. He also took his diapers off any time he could. He hated both diapers and diaper change. For being a boy he was early to start with the potty. For some toddlers, this is an option too, although it won’t solve the immediate situation, of course.

It is a really good thing she is this determined, even though it is very hard to manage, particularly at change time! But babies who display their own minds and determination are going to be adults who are responsible, keen to learn, and more likely to be leaders and creative thinkers. So bear with it; she may well be destined for great things!

You can read a bit more about 1-year-old babies and games to play with them here.

Enjoy your time with your granddaughter.

All the best,
Paula

Does anyone recognize this situation? How did you solve it? Add your comments below.

Paula Dennholt

Paula Dennholt founded Easy Baby Life in 2006 and has been a passionate parenting and pregnancy writer since then. Her parenting approach and writing are based on studies in cognitive-behavioral models and therapy for children and her experience as a mother and stepmother. Life as a parent has convinced her of how crucial it is to put relationships before rules. She strongly believes in positive parenting and a science-based approach.

Paula cooperates with a team of pediatricians who assist in reviewing and writing articles.